Well, I guess I better come clean and tell you that I didn't actually have a live coaching conversation with Star Jones but in my dreaming room, I had one helluva chat with her. Walt Disney created what he called The Dreaming Room for his company to create breakthroughs in animation and the many masterpieces we have come to love. Michael Gerber combined what he learned about entrepreneurs with Walt Disney's Dreaming Room experience and invented a unique environment for small business owners and executives to create the impossible. So in my infamous dreaming room 'create the impossible' moment last night, I dreamed about what I would have said to Star Jones if she were my coaching client. Before I share with you the five tips that I would have shared with her on how to maximize the moment (next time), let me provide some context around this post.
What Star Jones has experienced is no different than what many of us will experience at some point in our careers - a separation. Whether it's a result of an reorganization, merger, acquisition, downsize, rightsize or you merely left on your own terms, separation is highly likely. I wanted to share these tips with you because we can all learn something from that very ugly situation that played out in front of millions of viewers. There are some things that you have to go through in order to learn and then there are those things that you simply learn from others mistakes. So, when the time comes for you to part ways with your employer, get yourself prepared to maximize the moment by taking heed in these five tips of advice that I offered Ms. Star in our private dreaming room experience:
- You must realize that your boss is the co-creator of your brand. Although Star had a powerful presence as an attorney before she claimed her esteemed seat on The View, her affiliation with Barbara Walters helped to power up her brand exponentially. The fact that her name has been listed in the American Heritage Dictionary shows that she is a heavyweight in the entertainment/journalism space. Had Star taken a different approach to announcing her departure, Barbara could have very well have helped her broker a few other irresistable deals or at least given her a glowing reference. The references that you receive (or lack thereof) are in direct proportion to your brand. Never burn bridges as your previous managers may just be the reference that you need to get that next job.
- Never let them see you sweat! I know, I know this sounds so cliche' but it's also so true. Always stay in the zone by continuing to bring your 'A-Game' in everything that you do. Let them see you exiting with much ease, grace and confidence while leaving a few indelible imprints that they'll hate to see you leave. Once you walk out the door, release it fully and get ready for the bigger, better opportunities that will be placed in your path.
- Put your emotions and your pride to the side. If you are leaving under not so good circumstances, this is the worst time to be emotional and let your pride get you into something that will be very hard to fix if not irrepairable. I know that you probably can't wait until that dreaded last day to give it to your boss and tell them exactly how you really feel about them. You may have been passed over too many times to count for that promotion or have been treated poorly, but even in the face of an overwhelming desire to let your boss have it, do not do it. Instead, take stock in what you've learned, take what's great with you and leave the rest behind. You'll never know where and when you and that dreaded boss' paths may cross again.
- The spotlight is on you - you might as well shine. You didn't come this far in your career only to have your image tarnished by the way you conduct yourself during those final days on your way out the door. Reach out to your centers of influence within the organization, including your boss, and give thanks for the opportunity to have been a part of the team. Recount the many relationships you have formed, learning opportunities and growth initiatives that you were apart of and wish them well on their journey to continue to build upon their success. Let them know that the value of what you have learned under their stewardship, will certainly set the tone for how you move forward in your new endeavors. Keep in mind that this message must be delivered authentically and with integrity so you must craft messages that resonate well with your own personal situation.
- Operate from a position of excellence to the end. Try to wrap up all of your major assignments and set up a meeting with your boss or whoever he or she designates to do a data dump. It's very important that YOU initiate this meeting as it will speak volumes about your character. In this meeting, you'll give all the details of any open projects, turn over any files and passwords to your system. The goal is to make the transition as easy as possible but don't make commitments about the transition that you can not keep. You will have already won big by initiating the meeting in the first place, so just do what you can and move on.
While I realize that everyone's experience is not quite like Star's, I hope that you realize that there is a lesson to learn in every situation and that these tips will help prepare you for your next separation. This brings to mind a great quote from Edwin Lewis Cole..."There are two things you do in life: enter and leave. How you enter determines how you leave, and how you leave determines how you enter." Enter and leave with Excellence and Grace and you'll do just fine.
To your success!
Felicia
P.S. If you'd like to learn more about how to power up your career portfolio, join me tomorrow night as I will be the guest speaker for Dr. Beverly Tillman's teleseminar. Click here to get more details and register for this information-packed session.
Terrific advice Felicia - not just for Star Jones but all of us. Thanks! Liz
Posted by: Liz Ryan | July 13, 2006 at 09:37 AM